...And the Truth Will Make You Free
I have had the unusual opportunity of late of being the
‘proxy parent’ for a young Indian woman who is seeking a ‘life partner’ in her
marriage vocation. Her culture strongly
encourages that this in large part be ‘an arranged marriage’. This means that
the parents basically decide if this is a good match. Kulbir’s parents are in India and not able to
review the possible grooms. That is
where I have stepped in. This does not
settle easily with me. I believe it is a
couple’s right to choose the relationship.
None the less, not wanting to disrespect her cultural values I have sat
with Kulbir as she/we have met a series of Indian men who may/may not become
part of this arrangement.
This experience has invited me to step back and review
the steps I have made in choosing my vocation.
Like Kulbir, I certainly thought extensively about becoming a vowed
religious. And like her, I did take time
to look around/interview what might be a good fit.
Kulbir recently traveled home to India to see her parents
and meet her potential new in-laws.
Again time and attention were given to this life vocation. There was even a special ring ceremony where
a pledge was made for this possible union. This happened even though the ‘fiance’
was here in Seattle. Each day while she
was in India her possible (now in fact)
fiancé called her and they talked. They
are taking time to get to know each other. They are gleaning the truth about one
another. That is what needs to happen
not just once but on and on in any vocation.
I entered in 1965.
Being a Dominican of Sinsinawa has taught me how to deepen my honesty,
my truth-seeking and my freedom. It is
something that does take time and intentionality. It has been well worth the effort.
K.C. Young, OP
Kirkland,
Washington
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